season one
In the Riverlands, Tyrion Lannister, the brother of Queen Cersei Lannister, makes a stop for the night at the Crossroads Inn, with a man of the Night’s Watch named Yoren. The innkeeper tells the pair that she has no rooms but Tyrion holds aloft a coin and asks if anyone is willing to give up his bed for the night. A sellsword named Bronn replies yes, as Tyrion thanks him and notices Lady Catelyn Stark in the corner, wife to the Warden of the North, Lord Eddard Stark. Tyrion informs Catelyn that he is sorry to have missed her during his most recent visit to her home of Winterfell. Catelyn rises from her table and identifies several knights who serve as bannermen for her father, Lord Hoster Tully of Riverrun. Tyrion admires her father’s great friends, but is unsure what she is doing. Catelyn then announces to the whole inn that Tyrion was a guest in her household several weeks ago when King Robert Baratheon paid a visit and had betrayed that trust by conspiring to murder her son Bran Stark, a boy of ten, who has survived two attempts on his life. She calls upon those knights present to help her seize Tyrion and return him to Winterfell to “await the king’s justice,” believing that he is responsible for the attacks. Several knights pull out their swords and level them at Tyrion, to his amazement. Bronn himself then follows Lady Catelyn with her hostage, as Tyrion had promised the sellsword gold.
Some days later, Catelyn Stark and several companions from the inn – including Bronn, are taking a hooded and bound Tyrion through a range of tall hills. As they stop, Tyrion’s hood is removed and he realizes that they are not on the Kingsroad and his father Lord Tywin Lannister will have people looking for him in the wrong place. Bronn listens to Tyrion when promising a handsome reward to any man who helps him. Tyrion realizes that they are instead on the Eastern Road, meaning that Catelyn is taking him to see her sister, Lady Lysa Arryn, to answer for his imagined crimes. Tyrion asserts that Lysa has changed since losing her husband Jon Arryn, the former Hand of the King to Robert Baratheon. He suggests Catelyn would be better off killing him where he stands. Catelyn says she is not a murderer, but Tyrion urges that neither is he, and what kind of imbecile would arm an assassin with his own blade? Suddenly the party is attacked by a group of tribesmen from the hills. Several of the knights from the inn are killed, however, Bronn holds his own in the skirmish, killing several opponents. Tyrion asks Catelyn to untie him so he can fight and he then overcomes one assailant, killing him with the shield of one of the fallen knights. The tribesmen are defeated and Bronn asks Tyrion if that was his first kill. When Tyrion nods, Bronn insists that he needs a woman, which always the best thing after a fight. Tyrion nods at Catelyn and jokes that he's willing if she is.
Later on, Bronn arrives at the Eyrie when Tyrion comments that the castle is impregnable to attack. Bronn, however, insists that if given “ten good man and climbing spikes, I’ll impregnate the bitch.” Upon entering the High Hall, Lysa Arryn gives Tyrion a cold reception. She is annoyed that Catelyn brought him to the castle without permission, endangering all of them. Tyrion and Catelyn are distracted by the unedifying sight of Lysa's son Robin – and the titular Lord of the Vale – still sucking at her breast despite being many years too old for it. Catelyn is puzzled by Lysa’s attitude, since she wrote to Catelyn in order to warn her about the Lannisters. Lysa asserts that she warned Catelyn to stay away from them, adding that Tyrion murdered her husband. Tyrion is surprised to hear how busy he has been. Lysa is annoyed that he thinks this is funny, as the knights present would gladly die for her. Young Robin then tells Tyrion that no-one can hurt them in the Eyrie and that he wants to see the bad man "fly". Catelyn insists that Tyrion is her prisoner and will not be harmed. Lysa agrees, suggesting that her "guest" should be shown comfortable quarters. Tyrion is thrown into one of the Eyrie’s sky cells, rooms which are open on one side with a sheer drop to the valley floor thousands of feet below.
Some time later, after a few failed attempts at bribing a simple-minded guard named Mord, Tyrion stands in the center of the High Hall and acknowledges that he wishes to confess his crimes. Lysa is pleased, commenting that he has been broken by the sky cells. She instructs “the Imp" to speak. As Bronn and the court stand watching, Tyrion appears to struggle with the relating of his crimes. However, when he begins, the crimes he confesses to are merely those of lying, gambling, cheating, encouraging violent behavior, whore-mongering, and playing nasty practical jokes. Bronn finds this amusing, but Lady Lysa loses her patience with Tyrion, as Catelyn asks him to speak directly on the charges of which he has been accused: conspiring in the murder of Jon Arryn and the attempted murder of Bran Stark. Tyrion repeats that he is innocent of these charges and is accused without benefit of a trial. Lysa explains that there will be a trial and, if found guilty, Tyrion will die. Tyrion may present evidence, and afterward Robin will act as judge and give the verdict. To everyone’s surprise, however, Tyrion announces that he wants his innocence proved in a trial by combat. There is scattered laughter from the court and after several appeals by an increasingly nervous Tyrion, just when it seems that no-one will fight for him, Bronn volunteers with a shrug. Two men then turn the wheel that opens the moon door as Ser Vardis Egen, Bronn’s combatant, lowers the visor on his helm. Robin Arryn rises from next to his mother on the weirwood throne and swings his knife to the cry of "Fight!" to begin the combat. They come together with blows and sword swings, but almost immediately, Bronn starts to give ground, leaving Vardis to swing repeatedly while he retreats. The combat leads them back to the moon door where Ser Vardis tries to throw Bronn over the edge. Bronn manages to push him back and cuts Egen across the back of the knee. Ser Vardis can only rise with great difficulty, and he tries again to attack, but Bronn dodges aside and trips him. Bronn kicks away Egen's heavy shield and, at his next strike, Bronn catches his arm. Bronn looks Lysa in the eye as he plunges the sword in under Vardis' helm. There are gasps of horror from the court, and Bronn allows Ser Vardis' limp body to drop through the moon door and to fall to the ground far below. Tyrion nods his approval. Lysa is disgusted and accuses Bronn of having fought without honor. Bronn agrees that he hadn't, but assures her that Ser Vardis had, as Tyrion then has his shackles removed. Robin wishes to know if the fight is over, and if he can make the little man fly now. Tyrion says that will have to be another little man, as he is going home. Tyrion bows to Catelyn and Bronn follows him out the front door of the hall.
The following day, Bronn and Tyrion journey together on foot as they have reached the western edge of the Vale of Arryn. Bronn establishes some ground rules with Tyrion, stating that he is not Tyrion's friend or his sworn sword, and is only working for him for the money. Tyrion accepts the situation and promises to beat any future offer to buy Bronn's loyalty. They are then suddenly surrounded by men of the hill tribes, led by a fearsome warrior named Shagga. At first, he orders them to be killed, but Tyrion does some fast-talking and convinces the hill tribes that House Lannister is an enemy of the House Arryn and its rulers. Tyrion uses his quick wit and words to win the allegiance of the tribes, offering to better equip them for battle and help them conquer the Vale in return for their help. Shagga agrees, though he notes that if Tyrion tries to renege on his promise he will cut off his manhood and feed it to the goats. Shagga and the hill tribe then escort Tyrion and Bronn westwards towards where the Lannister armies are gathered. Tyrion’s father Lord Tywin has gathered his forces and have been attacking Catelyn's home in the Riverlands ever since word spread of Tyrion’s arrest. Though he does not care about his son, Tyrion is still a Lannister, and if they allow one of their own to be taken so easily, they risk losing respect.
Bronn, Tyrion, Shagga and the rest of the hill tribesmen later arrive at the Lannister encampment to find Lord Tywin and his brother, Ser Kevan Lannister, planning to engage the Stark army, who are moving south from the Neck. When Bronn is introduced to Tywin he quips that Tywin wouldn't have met his father, a nod to his low-born status. Tywin himself shows no sign of relief that his son is alive, as Tyrion then warns his father that Robb Stark should not be underestimated. Shocking news of King Robert Baratheon’s death has also made it’s way to the Riverlands as Tyrion’s nephew Joffrey Baratheon has now taken the Iron Throne. Tywin then agrees to honor Tyrion's alliance with the hill tribes. When Shagga insists they will only fight if Tyrion fights alongside them, this prospect which Tywin welcomes only terrifies Tyrion. Later on, as the Lannister armies prepare for battle Tywin tells his son that he means to use the hill tribe forces to give them an edge against the Stark army, essentially to be used as cannon fodder. He orders Tyrion to lead them from the front of the vanguard. Tyrion angrily accuses his father of trying to kill him. After his father’s request, an angry Tyrion storms back to his tent where he finds that Bronn has found a whore for him, a foreign girl from Essos named Shae.
That evening, Bronn, Tyrion and Shae play a drinking game together where they make observations of one another, and if correct, the person has to drink. It is revealed that Bronn’s parents beat him, that he killed for the first time before the age of twelve (a woman who attacked him with an axe), and that he has been beyond the Wall. Tyrion then guesses that Shae is low-born and her mother was also a whore, however, he is wrong on each guess. When Shae starts to question Tyrion, Bronn reveals that he heard Tyrion was once married. Reluctantly, Tyrion explains that when he was very young, he and his brother Ser Jaime Lannister were out riding near Casterly Rock and found a young common girl in distress from bandits. While his brother chased the bandits off, Tyrion comforted the girl and ended up getting drunk at a local inn. Later that night, she had sex with Tyrion, the first time he was ever with a woman. Tyrion fell madly in love, and bribed a drunken septon to marry them in secret. However, two weeks later, his father Tywin found out and was utterly furious that his son had married a commoner. Tywin forced Jaime to reveal the truth: the girl was a prostitute. Jaime set the situation up to do something nice for his little brother. Tywin then instructed each of his guards to have sex with her while Tyrion was forced to watch. Shae points out that Tyrion was foolish to believe a woman would sleep with him just hours after almost being raped. As she becomes more romantic with Tyrion, Bronn then leaves the tent for the night.
The next morning, Bronn hurriedly awakens Tyrion, as the Lannister army has found out that the Starks have stolen a march on them, are about to be attacked and have to hastily prepare for battle. Tyrion then leads Bronn and the hill tribesmen into battle at the Green Fork of the Trident River, giving a rousing speech, but as they charge for the front Tyrion is nearly trampled on. Subsequently, he is then knocked out by an accidental blow to the head from someone's club seconds into the start of the battle. When he regains consciousness on the back of a wagon, Bronn informs Tyrion that the Lannisters won the battle, however, it was a feint. Bronn brings Tyrion before his father Tywin on the wagon. He learns from his father that Robb Stark deceived them, and as a diversion, sent a small portion of his army to confront and delay Tywin's forces. Meanwhile, the main Stark army marched on Riverrun to attack Ser Jaime's forces, with the Northern army now regrouping for an attack on the capital of King's Landing. Later on, word is received that following his defeat at Riverrun, Tyrion’s brother Jaime has been taken prisoner by Robb Stark. News has also arrived from the capital that Tyrion’s nephew, King Joffrey, has publicly executed Eddard Stark for treason, further stoking the fire between the Lannisters and Starks.
“You need a woman. Nothing like a woman after a fight.”
“I should just take your food and leave you here, hey? What would you do then? You don’t think I’d do it, do ya? … Don't go looking for me to bend the knee and "m'lord" you every time you take a shit. I'm not your toady and I'm not your friend.”
— ‘The Pointy End’
“Give me ten good men and some climbing spikes. I'll impregnate the bitch.”
“Our Lord, here. He used to be married… You hear lost of things when you play dice with Lannister soldiers… I’m guessing the lady and I can tell more unpleasant stories than your lordship.”
— ‘Baelor’
“I’ll stand for the dwarf.”
— ‘A Golden Crown’
“You’re a shit warrior. You’re alive… We wouldn’t be having this conversation if we didn’t [win].”
— ‘Baelor’
season two
Some weeks later, outside the Red Keep castle of King’s Landing, King Joffrey holds a tournament to celebrate his nameday. His bodyguard, Sandor Clegane, defeats his opponent, knocking him over the walls of the castle. He shouts congratulations to the Hound and then asks Sansa Stark if she enjoyed the duel. As Joffrey's captive, Sansa, still reeling from her father Lord Eddard’s execution, is deferential but subdued. Joffrey is then irritated by Ser Dontos Hollard, a knight from House Hollard, who arrives both late and intoxicated for his bout. Joffrey orders his guards to pour an entire barrel of wine down the knight’s throat with a funnel. Sansa, however, intercedes telling Joffrey that ordering a death on one's nameday is bad luck. Joffrey dismisses this as superstition, but the Hound seconds her. Sansa then convinces Joffrey to instead make Dontos his court fool, for which Dontos is grateful. Tyrion Lannister then suddenly arrives alongside Bronn, who remains his personal bodyguard. As commanded by his father Lord Tywin, Tyrion assumes the role of Acting Hand of the King to Joffrey, who isn't happy to see his uncle, unlike his younger siblings Myrcella and Tommen Baratheon. Joffrey says they had heard rumors that Tyrion was dead and Myrcella interjects that she is glad they were false. Tyrion then offers his condolences to Sansa on the death of her father, much to Joffrey’s irritation.
Days later, Tyrion invites Lord Janos Slynt of the City Watch to his chambers as a dinner guest, with Bronn standing guard. Tyrion asserts that Janos must be getting used to fine dinners since his promotion as Lord of Harrenhal and then asks about the recent incident in Littlefinger's brothel. Janos says it was a nasty business killing the late King Robert’s bastard children, but had to be done. Tyrion feigns agreement, saying that the peace must be kept before adding that he did not realize, however, the peace depended on killing babies, asserting that no-one else would want to murder the bastard children. Janos the states that only Tyrion knows his sister Cersei better than he does. Janos then accuses Tyrion of being drunk and states that he will not let him impugn his honor. Tyrion asserts that he is not questioning Janos's honor, but denying its existence. Janos stands up and threatens Tyrion, who then nods to Bronn and summons four gold cloaks, informing Janos he is being sent to the Night’s Watch and that he will leave on a ship tonight. Janos insists that the men are under his command but Tyrion explains that Bronn is now commander of the City Watch, as reward for his recent loyalty. Janos is dragged off, still protesting about his connections at court. Tyrion then asks Bronn if he tells him to murder an infant without question, the sellsword informs that his only question would be “how much?”
Some time later, flexing the muscles of his new position as Hand, Tyrion tests the loyalty of King Joffrey’s small council by feeding Grand Maester Pycelle, Lord Varys and Lord Petyr Baelish a different plan each for a future marriage alliance involving his niece Myrcella. The plan is designed to ascertain which of the council members has been leaking information to his sister Cersei. That evening, Lord Baelish rages at Tyrion in the Tower of the Hand for involving him in his deception. Tyrion apologizes and offers him another task: convincing Catelyn Stark to free his imprisoned brother Jaime. Bronn then interrupts and Tyrion asks if he has found his target. Bronn informs that Grand Maester Pycelle was not alone, calling him a filthy old stoat. The pair then burst into Pycelle's chamber while he is in bed with a prostitute named Daisy. Pycelle denies his crime but Tyrion explains that he has implicated himself by revealing to Cersei the specifics of the version of the marriage alliance he alone was informed of. Tyrion asks how long Pycelle has been spying for Cersei, who claims that he has been loyal to House Lannister since the days of King Aerys Targaryen. Tyrion then commands Bronn and Timett to arrest Pycelle and orders Bronn to cut off the old man's beard. Tyrion doesn't go through with this, however, and Bronn simply snips off a bit of Pycelle's beard before dragging him to the Black Cells.
Days later, King Joffrey threatens Sansa Stark in the throne room with an ornate crossbow demanding she answer for her brother Robb Stark’s treason, as she denies having any involvement. Joffrey then suggests that killing Sansa would send Robb a message, but lowers his crossbow, citing his mother Cersei’s insistence that Sansa be kept alive. Instead he orders Ser Meryn Trant of the Kingsguard to beat Sansa but spare her face. Before the spectacle continues further, Tyrion storms in with Bronn and demands an explanation, reminding Joffrey that he is to marry her. Joffrey says that he was punishing her, as Tyrion wonders for what crimes she committed, calling Joffrey a half wit. Joffrey asserts that he can do as he likes as king, though Tyrion reminds him of the fate of “Mad King” Aerys, who ruled without regard over his actions. Tyrion helps Sansa up and walks her out of the throne room. He apologizes for Joffrey’s behavior and asks if she wants to end the engagement. She asserts her loyalty and love for Joffrey. Tyrion calls her Lady Stark and says that she may yet survive her captivity. Bronn suggests that Joffrey’s aggression may stem from sexual tension and advises to organize a prostitute to temper the boy’s cruelty. Tyrion then arranges for two whores for his nephew, however, he later learns that Joffrey forced Ros to beat Daisy as a message to his uncle.
Later on, Tyrion meets with his cousin Ser Lancel Lannister in a litter on the street’s of King’s Landing, as Bronn stands guard. Lancel reveals that Cersei’s plans for the defense of the city against the rivaling king, Stannis Baratheon, hinge on the use of wildfire. Lancel informs Tyrion that his sister has met with the Alchemists' Guild, who have already stored thousands of pots of the substance for her. When Bronn escorts Tyrion to the Alchemists’ Guild, he informs him that the smallfolk believe that Tyrion is manipulating Joffrey and blame him for the ills of the city. In the basement of the Alchemists' Guild, Tyrion holds a vial of wildfire and recalls an old sailor’s proverb “Piss on wildfire and your cock burns off.” Bronn grins as Wisdom Hallyne informs that he has never conducted that particular experiment. Hallyne claims that wildfire was the key to the power of House Targaryen after their dragons died out and then leads Tyrion and Bronn into the guild’s tunnels and opens a heavy door. Hallyne warns that Bronn would not have dared to insult an order of pyromancers while King Aerys lived. Bronn points that Aerys is dead and that all of his wildfire did not help him. Bronn asserts that men win wars and not magic tricks. A massive cellar is then revealed to contain rows upon rows of wildfire. Hallyne informs that they have amassed nearly eight-thousand pots. Bronn repeats his fear about this as a bad idea, as Tyrion commands that Hallyne will be making wildfire for him from now on.
Some weeks later, Tyrion turns to books for insight into siege defense tactics. Bronn, however, warns him that the grim realities of a siege cannot be understood from reading, elucidating that starvation is the great killer of a siege and that food becomes the most valuable commodity. Bronn insists that if things are bad enough the poor will turn to cannibalism, while the rich will give away their most valued possessions in exchange for simple provisions. He adds that the thieves prosper most in a siege. Lord Varys then arrives and agrees that extreme measures are warranted under the circumstances. Tyrion reaches for a map and informs that Stannis Baratheon is familiar with the layout of the capital, predicting that the Mud Gate as the likely point where Stannis will attack. Tyrion informs that it will be desirable to Stannis because it is weak to battering rams and only fifty yards from the shore. Varys then asks what they plan to do to defend the weak spot, as Bronn jokes that they could throw books at Stannis’ men. Varys then asserts that they do not have that many books, as Bronn retorts that they don’t have many men either. Varys asks Tyrion what they do have and Tyrion responds “pig shit,” alluding to what Bronn had called wildfire in front of the pyromancer Hallyne.
Some time later, inside a tavern within the capital, Lannister soldiers prepare for the battle against Stannis’ forces that is within moments from commencing. The soldiers carouse with prostitutes and Bronn is amongst them. Joffrey’s bodyguard, Sandor Clegane, then enters, silencing the men. Bronn calls out a welcome and offers Sandor a drink. The Hound only stares at him in response, as Bronn then suggests that Sandor doesn’t like him. Sandor downs his drink and asks Bronn if he thinks that he is a hard man, as Bronn insists that he knows he is. He then states that they have a warm room, beautiful women and plenty of good brown ale to drink. He wonders why Sandor only wants to put one of them in the ground with no women to keep them company, as Sandor counters that there are plenty of women in the ground and that he has put some there himself. The Hound states that while Bronn likes singing, drinking and women, he truly loves killing. Sandor then asserts that they are the same, only Bronn is smaller, with Bronn adding that he is also quicker. The Hound and Bronn square up to each other but they are interrupted by the ringing of bells, summoning them to arms. Bronn then suggests another drink before the war. The Hound, however, turns away from him, leaving a smiling Bronn. As they plan for battle in the throne room, Tyrion reminds Bronn to wait until the ships are deep into the bay and warns him not to get killed as they shake hands. Tyrion returns the sentiment, calling Bronn a friend and asserts that paying Bronn for his services does not diminish their friendship. Bronn skeptically jokes that if anything it enhances it. Bronn bows to the newly arrived Sansa and Shae on his way out of the throne room. At the Mud Gate, the Lannister forces witness Stannis’ fleet emerging from the darkness as Tyrion orders his archers to prepare. A single ship emerges from the city docks as a terrified Joffrey asks where the rest of their fleet is. Wisdom Hallyne climbs the stairs and hands Tyrion a flaming torch to which Tyrion drops the flaming torch to lighting a beacon. Bronn stands on the shore of Blackwater Bay with a bow in hand and after seeing the beacon he fires a high arcing shot into the middle of the bay where the lone ship is floating and leaking green wildfire into the waters. The green flame spreads rapidly, engulfing the deserted Lannister ship until the vessel explodes and Stannis’ ships in the main blast zone are eradicated instantly, though Stannis’ ship remains unharmed. Hallyne giggles as he sees the fruits of his labor as Tyrion is fascinated and appalled by the devastation of his plan. Chaos rains amongst the fleet as the men try to get away from the burning wildfire the explosion has catapulted into the air and the substance ignites everything it touches with orange flames dancing amongst the sickly green. Stannis asserts that Tyrion has played his trick and can only play it once as he makes for the port bow to shout to his men “Come with me and take this city.” They cheer and follow him over the side of the ship. Stannis kneels in the prow of a longboat as his army is rowing for shore in a fleet of similar boats. Tyrion watches their approach from atop the walls as Joffrey begins to panic. Tyrion orders the archers to rain fire on the attackers and for Sandor to lead a sortie beyond the gate to kill anyone who reaches shore. Stannis leads his men through the hail of arrows, sustaining heavy casualties, as Sandor leads his troops out through the gate. Shortly into the melee battle, Bronn returns to the city walls, arriving in time to save Sandor with a well-shot arrow when Sandor freezes from the sight of a soldier on fire during the fighting. Sandor himself then retreats, allowing Stannis to establish a small foothold atop the wall. Joffrey commands Sandor to return to the fray, as Tyrion reminds him that he is a member of the Kingsguard and must beat the enemy back. However, Clegane angrily says, “Fuck the Kingsguard, fuck the city, fuck the king,” whilst walking away from battle. As Stannis’ force continues to grow with each landing ship, Joffrey also retreats and orders Ser Mandon Moore to stay with Tyrion to represent the king on the battlefield. Tyrion looks around at his muttering troops and, after a rousing speech he and the remaining soldiers head towards the tunnel in order to attack from behind. As the men are let outside of the tunnel, they swiftly kill the attackers surrounding the Baratheon battering ram. The victorious Lannisters start chanting "Halfman" at Tyrion when the ram burns. Tyrion then takes off his helm in with pride but then hears more attackers coming from the far side of the shore. Stannis continues to battle atop the walls but has not been joined by enough men to move on. Amidst the battle, Tyrion notices Ser Mandon staring at him and walks over to the Kingsguard. Mandon then rushes at Tyrion and swings his sword at his face in a sudden and vicious down-cut. Tyrion shouts as the blade slices across his forehead and cheek. He collapses to his knees and Mandon raises his sword again. From behind, Tyrion’s squire Podrick Payne then stabs Ser Mandon through the back of his neck with a spear, killing him. Podrick rushes to Tyrion’s side, holding him up as blood pours from his wound. As Tyrion collapses into unconsciousness, he witnesses the forces of his father Tywin and his new allies in House Tyrell joining the battle and decimating Stannis' army. Stannis is dragged from the battle by his guards, screaming for his men to stand and fight. After the Baratheon army retreats, Tywin bursts into the throne room and announces their victory, just in time to stop Cersei from helplessly killing her youngest son Tommen with poison to spare him of a painful death.
“Without question? No… I’d ask how much.”
— ‘The Night Lands’
“Have you ever been in a city under siege? It's not the fighting that kills most people; it's the starving. Food's worth more than gold. Noble ladies sell their diamonds for a sack of potatoes. Things get bad enough, the poor start eating each other. The thieves, they love a siege. Soon as the gates are sealed, they steal all the food. By the time it's all over, they're the richest men in town.”
“The little king is backed up. Clogged from balls to brains. There’s no cure for being a cunt, but the boy is at that age. And he’s got nothing to do all day but pick wings off flies. Couldn’t hurt to get some of the poison out.”
— ‘Garden of Bones’
“It’s warm in here. We’ve got beautiful women and good brown ale. Plenty for everyone. And all you want is to put one of us in the cold ground with no women to keep us company.”
— ‘Blackwater’
“If I could tell you how many crazy old men I’ve seen pushing carts around army camps, making grand claims about jars full of pig shit.”
“First time, I was five. Me mam smacked me with an iron poker. It wasn't me she was aiming at. She were trying for me little brother. Now, he was a real pest. Second time, I was nine. Got in a scrap with a few older boys. They won. Third time- Eh, you don't want to know about the third time… Don't feel sorry for him. He'll be halfway up your arse before the night's through.”
— ‘Blackwater’
season three
Since the Battle of Blackwater, Bronn has been knighted by King Joffrey himself as a reward for the vital role he played in the battle. Several weeks later, Tyrion’s summons his squire Podrick Payne to find Bronn, as Tyrion fears that whoever ordered Ser Mandon to try to kill him during the battle will try to finish the job. Podrick interrupts an annoyed Bronn as he is enjoying the services of the prostitute Mirelle. Meanwhile, Queen Regent Cersei has come to pay Tyrion a visit shortly before Bronn arrives, and has brought two Kingsguard with her. Bronn finds them guarding the door to Tyrion's chamber and flippantly mocks them by calling them incorrect names. When Ser Meryn Trant corrects him, Bronn reveals that he is himself now a knight. Trant is incredulous, stating that Bronn is an upjumped cutthroat and nothing more. Bronn then non-chalantly admits this is exactly what he is, but returns the insult by calling out Meryn for what he really is: a "grub in fancy armor" with more experience at beating up little girls than at fighting men. Bronn then insists that they let him enter the room, but Meryn warns that if he puts a hand on the door, he'll lose the hand. As they are about to fight, Cersei emerges from Tyrion's chambers and takes Trant with her. As they walk, Tyrion is surprised to understand that Bronn has been knighted. While possessing no lands, wealth, or titles, this drastically elevates his social standing - and in his mind, his pay. He tells Tyrion that he still thinks of him a friend, but he is still a sellsword, and as a knight Tyrion should pay him double what he used to.
Some weeks later, Lord Tywin appoints Tyrion as the new Master of Coin, replacing Lord Baelish who is being sent to the Eyrie as an envoy. Tyrion drops by Littlefinger's office, where he keeps his ledgers. Tyrion and Ser Bronn then lead Podrick into the brothel where Tyrion rewards him for saving his life during the battle by paying for three prostitutes. Afterwards, Tyrion is reading through the financial records, and explains to Bronn that not all is as Lord Baelish would like the court to think. Littlefinger always acted like he was a financial genius but in reality the crown is heavily in debt, with most of it owed to the Iron Bank of Braavos, the largest bank in the Free Cities. Tyrion warns Bronn that when debtors to the Iron Bank cannot repay their loans the bank will ultimately support rebellions against them. Podrick then returns, with the money Tyrion gave him to pay the prostitutes. Tyrion is concerned that he lost heart and fled, but Pod innocently says he did "all sorts of things" with the prostitutes and they simply refused his payment. Impressed that the women would provide their services for free, Tyrion and Bronn ask Pod to explain in detail what transpired, so they can take copious notes.
Some weeks later, Tyrion and Cersei meet with their father Lord Tywin, who explains that House Tyrell are plotting to wed Sansa Stark to Ser Loras Tyrell and states that he will not allow them to steal "the key to the North." As Tywin believes Robb Stark’s days are numbered, this could leave Sansa as the heir to Winterfell and whomever she marries. He also notes that the Tyrells won't go through with their plan until after Joffrey's upcoming wedding to Lady Margaery Tyrell, which means they need to act first, namely by finding Sansa another husband. After a moment, Tyrion realizes from the comments of his father and sister that they are talking about him. Tyrion tries to protest, pointing out Sansa's age as well as treatment by his family thus far, but Tywin asserts he’s not concerned about the girl’s happiness. Tywin adds that Sansa is a far better reward than he could expect for leading the Battle of Blackwater and it is long past time Tyrion was wed. When Tyrion mentions his former betrothal to the prostitute Tysha, Tywin glares angrily, stating that he remembers all too well. Cersei gloats over the matter, but Tywin then commands that she will wed Ser Loras instead of Sansa. Cersei flatly refuses, but Tywin is insistent: the marriages of Cersei and Tyrion will place the North and the Reach firmly in the Lannisters' control.
Neither Tyrion or Sansa are particularly happy about their impending marriage. Some time later, in his chambers, Ser Bronn points out to Tyrion that he can easily wed Sansa and get a son and heir from her to placate his father and continue his private relationship Shae, thereby getting two women and a kingdom to rule for himself. However, Tyrion is concerned his mistress isn't going to be so willing to go along with that plan and is less than enthusiastic about having a wife, a mistress and the entire North despising him. Bronn points out that Tyrion is wasting his time trying to be universally loved. That evening, Tyrion's fears prove accurate when he visits a less-than-enthused Shae as he gifts her with a gold necklace. As she questions why golden chains Tyrion informs her that she could a ship with that necklace. An irritated Shae questions Tyrion as to why she would need to buy a ship and then asks him if she’s going somewhere she hasn’t been made aware of. When Tyrion insists that she isn’t going anywhere she quickly changes the subject to sarcastically enquire if she is invited to his wedding to Sansa. Tyrion asserts that while he did not ask for this arrangement it is his duty as a Lannister to fulfill, not desire. After a continued argument, Shae bluntly tells him that she will no longer sleep with him after he weds Sansa and asserts that, as Tyrion’s whore, once he is tired of fucking her she will be nothing.
Some time later, Tyrion speaks with Sansa in her chambers before their wedding in the Great Sept of Baelor. Though Tyrion knows the Stark girl is not thrilled at the prospect of marrying him, he nonetheless promises to Sansa that he will not mistreat her. Sansa politely insists there are worse Lannisters she could be wed to. Ser Bronn attends the ceremony and is either unable or unwilling to spend the money to obtain better clothing. He simply wears his regular tattered leather jerkin. The ceremyony itself is a grim affair as Joffrey smugly escorts Sansa to the altar in place of her father and petulantly removes the stool upon which Tyrion was to stand on to cloak Sansa in Lannister colors as part of the ceremony, eliciting snickers from the congregation, though the scowl of Lord Tywin quickly silences the court. Tyrion in the face of humiliation asks Sansa to kneel and he places the cloak around her shoulders. That evening, Bronn also attends the feast, as Tyrion gets deeply drunk and makes light of his father's insistence that his inebriated state will render him unfit to impregnate his wife. Tyrion, drunkenly reminds his father that Tywin has long called him "a drunken little lust-filled beast," so doing his duty in the marriage bed will not pose a problem. At the same time, Joffrey himself is drinking too much wine, and losing what few inhibitions he has as his behavior becomes increasingly offensive, specifically taunting Sansa that she's still found a way to marry a Lannister. Joffrey then reflects that it doesn't matter which Lannister gets her pregnant, and openly says he might want to rape her after Tyrion is done with her. Joffrey then declares in front of the court that it is time for the bedding ceremony, which involves the men at the wedding stripping the bride and the women stripping the groom before carrying them off to the marriage bed. However, Tyrion angrily insists there will be no bedding ceremony. When Joffrey keeps pushing the matter, a furious Tyrion slams a dagger into the table and threatens that Joffrey will be “fucking his own bride with a wooden cock” if he doesn't drop his insistence. As Bronn and the court stand in silence, Joffrey seethes with outrage. After a tense moment, Tywin defuses the situation by agreeing that there will be no ceremony, and placates Joffrey by claiming Tyrion's outburst is merely the result of his being drunk. Tyrion visibly swallows his anger and begins to act far more drunk than he actually is, intentionally humiliating himself. It isn't clear if anyone in the room, including Tywin or Joffrey, think that Tyrion's outburst was simply due to inebriation, but everyone plays along anyway to help the tension pass. Tyrion, while pretending to be so drunk he can barely stand, then escorts Sansa to their bedchamber.
“Back away. Keep backing away until you’re outside of this establishment, then back away some more… I will murder you boy.”
— ‘Valar Dohaeris’
“Pace yourself, lad.”
“Oh, look at these two shining warriors. Ser Taryn Mant and Ser Whosit of Whocares… You're a grob in fancy armor who's better at beating little girls than fighting men.”
— ‘Valar Dohaeris’
“You’re a lord, she’s a lady. And a beauty at that. I don’t see a problem. Shae is a whore. Are you gonna marry her, eh? How did marrying a whore work out the first time? You want Shae, keep her. Wed one and bed the other… You’ll have two women and a whole kingdom of your own.”
“You've given me a taste for the finer things. And if you want me to carry on protecting you, you'll need to pay more… We are [friends], but I'm a sellsword. I sell my sword. I don't lend it out to friends as a favor.”
— ‘Valar Dohaeris’
“You waste your time trying to get people to love you, you'll end up the most popular dead man in town. You want to fuck that Stark girl, you just don’t want to admit it… You pay me to kill people who bother you. Evil notions come free.”
season four
Some months later, Tyrion is sent to welcome Prince Doran Martell to the capital. As he, Ser Bronn and Podrick are expecting the Dornishman, they spot a Martell bannermen coming their way. Tyrion greets them, but they inform him that Prince Doran's declining health prevents him from leaving their capital of Sunspear, and therefore he has sent his brother Prince Oberyn Martell to attend King Joffrey's wedding in his stead. They also explain that Oberyn went ahead and entered the city before dawn. Tyrion informs Bronn that they should find Oberyn as soon as possible "before he kills somebody or several somebodies". Tyrion quickly puts together that he may be at one of the brothels. When Tyrion and Bronn arrive, they find Prince Oberyn stabbing a man's hand for singing “The Rains Of Castamere”, the infamous song of Westeros that is dedicated to House Lannister. Oberyn asks if Bronn is Tyrion's hired killer, and Bronn casually admits that it started that way, but he's a knight now. Oberyn asks how that came about, to which Bronn surmises that he supposes he must have killed the right people, amusing Oberyn. They are then introduced to Oberyn's paramour, Ellaria Sand. In private, Tyrion then asks Oberyn why he came to the capital, who tells him that he was invited to the royal wedding. Tyrion knows he's lying and asks for the honest truth. Oberyn then mentions Ser Gregor "The Mountain" Clegane, who brutally murdered his sister Elia Martell as well as her children. Oberyn warns Tyrion that the Lannisters are not the only ones who pay their debts.
Some days later, Tyrion shares a meal with his brother Ser Jaime, the famed knight who has returned to the capital after a long imprisonment and escape from the camp of the now-deceased Robb Stark. During his journey back, Jaime had his sword hand cut off and discusses his new gilded steel hand with Tyrion. Jaime discloses to his brother that he can no longer fight, as all of his instincts are wrong using his left hand. Jaime is perturbed that people will find out that he cannot fight, so Tyrion tells him that he needs to train with his left hand with someone trustworthy in order to better protect Joffrey, as the Lord Commander of the Kingsguard. Tyrion then assigns Bronn to train with Jaime in secret, who meets him in private far away from the Red Keep. Jaime is worried that someone might hear them but Bronn responds that he routinely has sex with a married woman in that place and that she is a screamer; if no one heard her, no one will hear them. Jaime remarks that he hasn't wielded a sparring sword since he was nine. As they commence training, Bronn uses his usual dirty tactics and gets the better of Jaime, teaching him not only to use his offhand, but encouraging him to fight dirtier.
Later on, as Lord Tywin’s threats to hang Tyrion’s “whore” becomes increasingly unavoidable, Tyrion meets with his lover Shae in his quarters and shows uncharacteristic and confusing coldness towards her despite her gestures of affection. Terrified for her safety Tyrion terminates their "friendship" and informs her that she is to leave and go to live in Pentos, telling her that she must do so in order for him to uphold her marital vows to Sansa. She deduces that he is afraid of his sister and father and expresses her desire to fight them alongside him. As she draws closer, Tyrion yells at her, calling her a whore, and states her unfitness to bear his children, in contrast to Sansa. Bronn then arrives to escort the sobbing Shae to the docks, resulting in her slapping him and storming off, broken-hearted. As Bronn consoles Shae outside, he advises her to adapt to circumstances, as lowborns are always spat out once used.
Later that afternoon, King Joffrey and Lady Margaery's wedding ceremony takes place in the Great Sept. Afterwards, at the wedding feast, Tyrion asks Ser Bronn if Shae is gone, who confirms that she boarded the ship. Bronn assures him that she is gone and no one knows about it except the two of them and Lord Varys. King Joffrey then speaks to the court about contemplating history and out of a large golden lion, five dwarves ride out, representing Joffrey, Stannis Baratheon, Balon Greyjoy and the deceased kings Robb Stark and Renly Baratheon, each of the five kings in the War of the Five Kings. The dwarves put on a jousting performance littered with crude sexual acts. Joffrey and Cersei laugh at the spectacle as the larger part of the wedding party find it unsurprisingly distasteful. The Tyrells, however, as well as Varys, Prince Oberyn and Tyrion make little effort to hide their disgust. Ser Loras Tyrell leaves in anger after watching the crude depiction of his deceased lover Renly riding a mount resembling himself, and Sansa looks on in obvious grief when the dwarf playing her brother Robb is killed after having his wolf's head knocked off. At the conclusion of the show, Joffrey suggests Tyrion fight the former's dwarf counterpart. Tyrion politely declines and sarcastically voices awe at Joffrey's skill and bravery at the Battle of the Blackwater, cautioning his nephew to be careful as the champion dwarf is "clearly mad with lust" and it would be a tragedy for the king to lose his virtue hours before his wedding night. This draws a few stifled chuckles from their guests. Enraged and humiliated that his uncle outwitted him in front of all his wedding guests, Joffrey petulantly pours wine over Tyrion's head and orders him to serve him wine as his cupbearer. He then instructs Tyrion to act as his cupbearer, before kicking the goblet under a table, forcing Tyrion to handle it several times. He finally orders him to kneel and Tyrion, obviously possessing no intention to do so, is saved by the arrival of the pigeon pie. Joffrey draws his new sword, cuts the pie, and several white doves fly out. Sansa and Tyrion attempt to leave the feast, while Margaery serves Joffrey a piece of pie. Joffrey commands Tyrion to serve him wine to wash down the pie. Tyrion hands the goblet to Joffrey and he quickly drinks all of it. Joffrey tries to speak, but begins coughing. He grabs his throat, and Margaery and Olenna exclaim that he is choking and needs help. Joffrey collapses face down and begins vomiting and convulsing and is visibly in excruciating pain. Jaime and Cersei rush in and turn Joffrey over on his back. Joffrey points an accusatory finger in Tyrion's direction, as he examines the wine goblet (though it is not made clear if Joffrey is accusing Tyrion or merely the wine). Joffrey's eyes turn red, blood runs from his nose, he stops convulsing, and dies in his mother’s arms. Cersei sobs with grief and orders the Kingsguard to seize Tyrion for the poisoning of her son. In the middle of the chaos, Dontos Hollard, a former knight turned court fool, suddenly approaches Sansa from behind and says she must come with him quickly, and she does as they then flee from the city together. Cersei quickly notices her disappearance and Tywin commands the Kingsguard to bar the city gates and seize any ships attempting to leave the capital.
Some time after Tyrion’s imprisonment, Ser Bronn is under investigation as his employer’s trial is fast-approaching. Later, Bronn and Ser Jaime are sword training again, and it seems that Jaime has made a marked improvement in his skills with his left hand as he begins to overpower Bronn. The hired sellsword then takes off Jaime's golden hand and slaps him with it as he falls to the ground, with Bronn lecturing Jaime as to the value of being willing to fight dirty. Jaime then asks Bronn his opinion on the king’s murder as Bronn asserts Tyrion’s innocence. He is then shocked when he realizes that Jaime hasn't yet gone to see his brother in the cells beneath the Red Keep, especially since Tyrion's original choice for his trial by combat at the Eyrie was Jaime. After hearing this, Jaime visits Tyrion in his cell. Convincing his brother that he didn't kill his son Joffrey, Tyrion notes that not even an irrefutable confession by the real perpetrator would satisfy Cersei. Jaime then informs Tyrion that Cersei offers a knighthood to whomever captures Sansa Stark. Tyrion insists that Sansa had nothing to do with the murder, despite having the best motive. Afterwards, as Podrick is about to leave King's Landing with Brienne of Tarth to locate the missing Sansa, Bronn has a gift for him from Tyrion: the axe he used during the Battle of the Blackwater.
Some weeks later, Tyrion's trial begins with the newly-crowned King Tommen Baratheon recusing himself. Instead, a group of three judges are appointed to oversee the trial: Lord Tywin, Lord Mace Tyrell of the Reach, and Prince Oberyn. Cersei has several witnesses testify against Tyrion, such as Meryn Trant, Grand Maester Pycelle and even Lord Varys. They all give strong, yet circumstantial, evidence of Tyrion's guilt. He seems particularly hurt by Varys' betrayal, so much that he asks the spymaster aloud to the court whether he remembered what he had told him after the Battle of the Blackwater. Varys sadly tells Tyrion that he never forgets anything. After an hour's recess, Jaime comes to Tyrion and tells him that, when the verdict of guilty is pronounced, he must ask for mercy. Secretly, Jaime had made a deal with Tywin: in exchange for sparing Tyrion, Jaime will renounce his vows and return to Casterly Rock as Tywin's heir, while Tyrion will be sent to live out his days on the Wall with the Night's Watch. Tyrion points out that their father wanted this outcome all along. However, Cersei calls in her last witness: Shae. Her appearance astounds Tyrion as she testifies that he and Sansa planned Joffrey's murder together, claiming that Sansa Stark wanted vengeance for the murder of her family. She tells the judges of Tyrion's sexual desires, embarrassing him in front of the crowd. Before she can continue, Tyrion, enraged beyond sense, angrily demands that he be allowed to confess his crimes. He angrily roars about how he saved King's Landing from Stannis Baratheon's forces and says he should have let Stannis kill everyone instead, much to the disgust of the people in the court. Tyrion then claims to be guilty as Tywin assumes that he is guilty for murdering Joffrey. Tyrion denies this, saying he is guilty of a "far more monstrous crime. I am guilty of being a dwarf!" Tywin scoffs at Tyrion's claims and says he is not on trial for being a dwarf. Tyrion angrily says he has been on trial for his entire life as a dwarf. Tywin asks if he has nothing to say in his defense. Tyrion then says he has nothing to say in his defense "but only this." He then reveals his true feelings about Joffrey, denying guilt in the king's murder but saying he wished to have killed Joffrey himself. Tyrion then turns his full fury towards Cersei and says that watching her "vicious bastard" of a son die gave him more relief than "a thousand lying whores." He then turns around to the court and roars that he wishes to have become the monster they thought he was and would have gladly give his life to watch everyone die from drinking poison. This enrages everyone in the court and Tywin orders Tyrion back to the dungeons. Before he can be escorted out, Tyrion bellows that he will not lose his life for a crime he did not commit and, knowing that he will get no justice from the court, demands a trial by combat.
A few days following the trial, Ser Bronn answers Tyrion's summons to his cell, now garbed in fancier clothes, and reveals that Cersei has arranged for him to marry Lollys Stokeworth, the second daughter of Lord Stokeworth, essentially a bribe to sway him from helping Tyrion. The marriage will elevate Bronn's social status once again, becoming a minor nobleman. Bronn is satisfied with the arrangement because Stokeworth's heir, Falyse is barren, thus ensuring Lollys will eventually inherit Castle Stokeworth, especially if Falyse suffers an "accident" beforehand. Bronn then reminds Tyrion of his promise to offer him double of whatever anyone that wanted him to sell Tyrion out was offering. Despite Tyrion's offer of wealth and possibly a portion of the North, Bronn notes that it now appears unlikely that he will control the North through Sansa. Moreover, Bronn openly doubts his ability to defeat Cersei's champion, the huge and fearsome Ser Gregor Clegane, as a single mistake could prove fatal. He points out that, despite their friendship, Tyrion never risked his life for him. Bronn explains: "I like you... I just like myself more." Given the extreme risk, and the very valuable marriage prospect Cersei offered, her bribe was the obvious choice. It was ultimately Bronn's guilt that led him to see Tyrion, deciding that his old friend deserved a face to face explanation. Tyrion is disappointed for his own sake but completely understands Bronn's decision, and notes that Bronn's opportunism is what he liked about him in the first place. They say their goodbyes and shake hands. Tyrion muses that he may have to kill the Mountain himself, joking that it would make for a great song. Bronn solemnly tells him that he hopes to hear it one day, nods apologetically, and leaves
Though Ser Bronn is not in attendance, Tyrion’s trial by combat commences days later. Prince Oberyn, after impressing the crowd with a display of acrobatic spear maneuvers, goes on the attack, stabbing out at Ser Gregor and constantly moving out of the knight's reach, forcing Gregor to tire himself out chasing his opponent. As he evades Gregor, Oberyn repeatedly taunts Gregor by constantly bringing up his part in the murder of his sister, Elia Martell, and her children, and demanding a confession, only enraging “the Mountain” further. As the “Red Viper” starts winning, Tyrion exchanges a few hopeful looks with Ser Jaime. After Oberyn pins Ser Gregor to the ground with his spear, however, Tyrion’s hopes are quickly shattered in the moment when the Mountain trips Oberyn to the ground and crushes his head in. With his fate sealed, Tyrion is struck with horror. Lord Tywin then states that the gods have made their will known and Tyrion is sentenced to death. As Tyrion stares in catatonic astonishment at Oberyn's skull-crushed corpse, Cersei smirks in vindication of his sentencing.
Some time later, Tyrion is surprised when Jaime frees him from his cell in the middle of the night and leads him through a secret passageway within the castle. He tells Tyrion that he will meet with Varys, who has arranged for him to escape to the Free Cities. The brothers warmly embrace and bid farewell. Instead of proceeding directly to his liaison, however, Tyrion first enters Lord Tywin’s chambers. He finds a woman in his father's bed, and is shocked to discover that it is Shae, moaning Tywin's name and calling for her "lion," what she used to call Tyrion. When Shae spots him, she grabs a knife and tries to stab him. As they struggle, Tyrion eventually strangles her with Tywin's gold chain she is wearing. The act is done both in self-defense and in jealous rage, and Tyrion is immediately distraught once he realizes what he’s done. After apologizing to Shae's corpse, he takes Joffrey's old crossbow and confronts Tywin while on the privy. Tywin tries to placate Tyrion, stating that he admires his will to survive but when he refers to Shae as a "whore" once too often, Tyrion kills his shocked father with two bolts to the chest. He then proceeds to meet with Lord Varys, who stows him away within a crate upon a ship, also deciding to accompany him across the Narrow Sea to start a new life.
“How many Dornishmen does it take to fuck a goat? Seems to me, smart place to meet travelers is in a tavern. That way when one party is late, the other party can drink some ale inside… He so damned important, how come they sent you to meet him?”
— ‘Two Swords’
“Your brother ever tell you how I came into his service? … Only when Lady Arryn demanded the trial take place that day. You were his first choice. He named you for his champion because he knew you would ride, day and night, to come fight for him. You gonna fight for him now?”
— ‘Oathkeeper’
“It started that way, aye. Now I'm a knight… Killed the right people, I suppose.”
— ‘Two Swords’
“If and may and could. It's bloody cold up north. Lollys is soft and warm, and close. If I gave you the choice between fucking Lollys and fighting the Mountain, you'd have your britches down and your cock out before I could blink.”
— ‘Mockingbird’
“If someone follows me without an invitation, I'm the last person they ever follow… [Shae is] gone. I know you don’t want to believe it but she is. Now, go drink until it feels like you did the right thing.”
“Why should I risk it? … You're my friend. And when have you ever risked your life for me? I like you, pampered little shit that you are. I just like myself more. I'm sorry it has to be this way… We had some good days together.”
— ‘Mockingbird’
season five
Some time following Tyrion’s disappearance from the capital, Cersei summons her brother Ser Jaime to their late father Tywin’s office in the Tower of the Hand. Upon Jaime’s arrival, Cersei reveals a "gift" from Dorne. As Jaime opens a metal box he finds inside an ornately carved viper, with a unique Lannister pendant suspended from its fangs. Cersei insists that is their daughter Myrcella’s necklace and this is a threat against the princess, a conclusion Jaime can't refute, as Ellaria Sand is working against the Lannisters following her lover Prince Oberyn’s death during Tyrion’s trial by combat. Acknowledging Cersei's distress, Jaime makes a promise: "I'm going to Dorne. And I'm bringing our daughter home." Afterwards, Ser Jaime travels through the Crownlands to visit House Stokeworth in order to recruit Ser Bronn on his mission to return Princess Myrcella to King's Landing. Outside the castle, Bronn is taking a stroll with Lollys just outside of Castle Stokeworth. Lollys talks at length about the upcoming wedding, but Bronn seems uninterested about discussing it. He does comfort Lollys when she talks about her sister Falyse, saying that mean people will always get what they deserve. The two are interrupted when they see Jaime near the castle. In private, Jaime reveals that Cersei has arranged for Ser Wyllis Bracken to wed Lollys instead of him, which angers Bronn, as he and Cersei had an agreement prior to Tyrion’s trial by combat. Jaime, however, tells Bronn that he will get a much better girl and a much better castle once they return. Bronn asks where they are going, and Jaime responds, "as far south as south goes." After Bronn’s agreement, they both set out on the Narrow Sea.
A few weeks later, Ser Bronn and Ser Jaime are on a Pentoshi merchant ship, which is headed to Oldtown in the Reach. Below deck, Jaime explains to Bronn that he bribed the captain to let them take a small boat to shore as they pass Dorne, and they will land just outside of Sunspear and the adjacent Water Gardens. Bronn then remarks on why Jaime must want to go and protect Princess Myrcella for himself: he's the one who let Tyrion escape from his imprisonment which resulted in the death of Lord Tywin. Bronn then states that Jaime hopes this will make up for his actions. However, Jaime curtly asserts that Lord Varys helped Tyrion escape, however in fact, Jaime forced Varys to help him free his brother. Remembering his old employer, Bronn asserts that if Jaime ever sees Tyrion again he should give him his regards. Jaime then angrily insists that if he sees his brother again, he's going to split him in two for murdering their father.
Once they reach the coast of Dorne, Bronn rows the pair ashore at dusk. When they awake the next morning Bronn kills a viper snake that was near Jaime's head and roasts it up for breakfast. Bronn is worried that the ship's captain will subsequently spread word that a Lannister is in Dorne; Jaime says he bribed him with a large bag of gold, but Bronn still worries. A mounted patrol soon comes by, however, and sees their tracks in the sand. Jaime and Bronn present themselves and try to pass off that they are simple travelers and their boat capsized in the night, but the ruse doesn't work, and the sentries demand that they drop their weapons so they can be taken prisoner and their identities confirmed. Bronn plants his sword in the sand - then quickly throws his dagger in the lead sentry's throat. Jaime and Bronn draw their swords and fight the rest. Jaime can't fight very well left-handed so Bronn kills one sentry's horse in order for Jaime to fight him on foot. Jaime is being overpowered but catches the sentry's sword with his metal hand at the last moment. He then uses the distraction to land a killing blow to the sentry with his left hand. Bronn, having finished off the other sentries, notes that they now have their horses: fine Dornish sand steeds, capable of running a day and a night without tiring. Jaime says the bodies need to be buried so they won't raise more questions. Bronn says it will take a lot of time to dig holes for them all, though Jaime again points out that he can't really do much digging with one hand. Annoyed, Bronn then drags off the bodies to bury.
Jaime and Bronn eventually approach the Water Gardens, wearing House Martell disguises from the soldiers they killed. Bronn wonders what Jaime will do once they get inside and find Myrcella, to which Jaime replies that he likes to improvise; Bronn sarcastically remarks "That explains the golden hand." Meanwhile, Ellaria Sand and three of the late Prince Oberyn’s bastard-born daughters, known as the Sand Snakes, are aware of Jaime’s arrival and are already inside the Water Gardens. Ellaria sends Oberyn’s daughters outside to abduct Myrcella, telling them to do it "for Oberyn.” When Jaime and Bronn infiltrate the Water Gardens they quickly come upon Myrcella kissing Prince Trystane Martell, whom she is arranged to wed. Jaime tries to convince Myrcella to come with him, but the Dornish prince interferes, suspicious of the bloodstains on their stolen robes. When Trystane tries to draw his sword, Bronn quickly knocks him down, to Myrcella's horror. Jaime then tries to lead Myrcella away, but they are suddenly attacked by the Sand Snakes. Bronn fights against both Tyene and Nymeria, while Obara attacks Jaime with her spear, driving him away from Myrcella. Obara then orders Nymeria to break away from Bronn and take Myrcella prisoner, but as Nymeria tries to pull her away, they are cut off by Prince Doran Martell’s guards, led by Areo Hotah, who surround them and force them all to drop their weapons. Bronn, Jaime, Ellaria and the Sand Snakes are all then taken into custody.
Some time later, the imprisoned Bronn is singing ‘The Dornishman's Wife’ in his prison cell, while in the adjoining cell, the Sand Snakes listen with a mix of annoyance from Obara and Nymeria but finding amusement with Tyene. After Bronn finishes, the two parties trade barbs, and Tyene then inquires about Bronn's arm, which she cut with her daggers during their fight in the Gardens. The two begin to talk about Tyene's beauty, which Bronn initially dismisses as “the most beautiful” until she begins to disrobe and exposes her breasts, teasing him. Bronn stares intently, his face firmly pressed against the cell bars during their back and forth. However, as he begins to renege on his previous dismissal of Tyene as the most beautiful woman, Bronn's nose then starts bleeding and his vision blurs as he collapses. Tyene reveals to the suddenly feverish Bronn that her daggers were coated with a slow-acting poison and her attempts to seduce Bronn were to get his heart pumping faster, thereby allowing the poison to act quicker. She points to an ampoule on her necklace, which contains an antidote for the poison, but only offers to give it to Bronn on the condition that he agrees that she is the most beautiful woman in the world. Growing weaker, Bronn barely manages to reply affirmatively but as he does Tyene then tosses the ampoule to a relieve him. After he drinks the antidote, which alleviates his symptoms quickly, Tyene smiles at him and remarks that she finds him handsome as well.
Some days later, Ser Jaime is escorted into the luxurious solar of the Water Gardens to meet with with Prince Doran, Ellaria, Trystane and his daughter Myrcella. Jaime states that he feared for Myrcella’s safety, explaining that they received a threat with her pendant. Doran glares at Ellaria as Jaime asks if he intends to behead him. Doran insists that he will not, because he wishes to avoid war and offers a toast to King Tommen. Jaime returns the toast but Ellaria pours her wine on the floor in disgust. Doran says he cannot disobey his king - Myrcella will return to the capital and his son Trystane will go along with them and join Tommen’s small council. Ellaria gets up to leave and snaps at him, stating that it’s no wonder Doran cannot stand, because he has no spine. Doran then threatens Ellaria if she ever talks to him that way again. Jaime then asks what fate will befall Bronn, politely insisting that he was only his following orders. Areo Hotah then escorts Bronn to the solar as then apologizes to Trystane when he sees him, saying he didn't mean anything by hitting him before. Jaime then gladly informs Bronn that the Martells agreed to let Bronn go with Jaime, but on one condition: wordlessly, Areo then delivers it by striking Bronn in the face with his elbow, so hard that Bronn is knocked to the floor.
Some days later, on the docks of Sunspear, Bronn, Jaime, Myrcella and Trystane bid farewell as they begin their voyage to King's Landing. Upon saying goodbye, Ellaria kisses Myrcella on the lips, while Tyene flirts with Ser Bronn, telling him she might come visit him. Bronn sarcastically replies not to wait too long as he's got a noblewoman to marry back home. Tyene cheekily tells him he wants a “good girl but needs a bad pussy,” and playfully bites his ear. After departing and onboard the ship, Jaime begins to come clean to Myrcella, awkwardly telling her that “you cannot choose who you love,” as he tries to find the words to confess that he is real father. Myrcella then reveals she has always known this deep down, and that she is glad that he is. As father and daughter embrace for the first time under this acknowledgement, Myrcella’s expression suddenly changes when the smile fades and her nose starts to bleed. A terrified Jaime holds the dying Myrcella in his arms until she passes. Still standing on the jetty in Sunspear, Ellaria and the Sand Snakes watch the vessel sailing away in the distance. Ellaria then wipes a thin stream of blood from her nose and drinks an antidote for the poison that is coated on her lips. A look of retribution spreads on Ellaria’s face as the Martell-Lannister rivalry reaches new heights.
“I’ve been all over the world and if there is one thing I’ve learned. It’s that meanness comes around. People like your sister, they always get what’s coming to them eventually. One way or another.”
— ‘The House of Black and White’
“Let's not do something stupid… That was something stupid.”
“There's nothing like a good fight to get you in the mood for fucking. And there's nothing like a fuck-mad Dornish girl to clear your head for the next fight. lt's how the two work together. Now we're gonna be doing a lot of fighting. But l don't imagine we'll get to stick around for the rest.”
“No great hurry [to leave]. Dornish women are the most beautiful in the world… I said Dornish women. I didn't say you. I've seen quite a few women in all the Seven Kingdoms.”
— ‘The Gift’
“I’ve had an exciting life. I want my death to be boring.”
“Maybe I’ll come visit you some time… Don’t wait too long. I’ve got a noblewoman to marry back home.”
— ‘Mother's Mercy’
season six
Several months later, Ser Bronn is recruited by Jaime Lannister to assist in Lord Walder Frey’s recapture of Riverrun, as his dominion over the Riverlands is weakened when Ser Brynden Tully, the deceased Catelyn Stark’s uncle, reclaims Riverrun from the Freys with what remains of House Tully's armies. Upon their arrival to the castle, both are dismayed by the incompetence of their Frey allies but Bronn expresses annoyance when Jaime suggests that he be the one to teach the Freys how to run a proper siege, insisting that Bronn is needed due to his abilities exceeding that of any soldier in the Lannister militia, to which Bronn rebuffs that is easy to be so. Reminding Jaime he was promised a castle, lands, and a wife for going to Dorne and has yet to receive any, Jaime tries to assure him he'll get all three if he helps him to command the siege but is cut off by the fed up knight. Bronn and Jaime are visibly disgusted when Frey’s son, Walder Rivers, fails to carry out his threat to kill the captive Edmure Tully, whom the Freys are trying to use as a bargaining chip to force the Blackfish's surrender. Bronn is present when Jaime strikes Walder for defying his orders to ensure that Edmure is treated well and fed. Acting under Jaime's authority, Bronn orders the Freys to dig perimeter trenches and to position trebuchets around the castle. Bronn expresses skepticism that Jaime's attempt to parley with the Blackfish will succeed but Jaime goes ahead. As Bronn predicted, Brynden refuses to yield the castle to the Iron Throne and vows to continue the siege
Later that day, Jaime comes face to face with Ser Brynden, as the drawbridge lowers and the Blackfish, as he is called, meets with him outside over the moat. However, it quickly becomes clear that the Blackfish is not interested in surrendering. Brynden asks Jaime whether he has come to honor his vow to his late niece, Catelyn Stark, and return her two daughters, Sansa and Arya Stark. When Jaime informs the Blackfish that he doesn’t have either of the girls, Brynden then asks him if he wishes to resume his captivity. Jaime informs him why he has been sent to Riverrun and commands his surrender in the name of King Tommen. After Brynden informs Jaime that his nephew is marked for death regardless, he then quips that "negotiating with an oathbreaker is like building on quicksand,” declaring that he is prepared to die in his home. Ser Brynden then challenges Jaime to storm the castle or try to starve them out, claiming that they have two years worth of provisions. The Blackfish then asks Jaime, "Do you have two years?"
Some days into the siege, Brienne of Tarth arrives at Riverrun with her squire Podrick Payne in order to seek an alliance with House Tully for Sansa Stark to fight House Bolton, who had taken over her ancestral home of Winterfell following the murders of Robb and Catelyn Stark. At base camp, Ser Bronn sneaks up on Podrick and greets him with a playful choke-hold. The sellsword is jubilant to see his old friend and the two exchange jokes about sex and sword-fighting skills. Bronn then offers to give Podrick a lesson in "dirty fighting," which the latter accepts. That evening, Jaime visits the captive Edmure and apologizes for the conduct of House Frey. Edmure is still defiant and insists that his uncle will not surrender Riverrun. Jaime then informs Edmure that he had sired a son with Roslin Frey, whom Edmure married at the Red Wedding massacre. If Edmure can convince the Blackfish and his garrison to surrender, he will allow for Edmure and his family to live in a comfortable exile. Edmure then asks Jaime how he sleeps at night after all the bad things he has done. Jaime then recounts his time as a captive of Edmure’s sister Catelyn. Despite her hatred for him, he came to respect Catelyn for her undying love towards her children. Jaime compares her love for her children to Cersei's love for her own. He then issues his final ultimatum to Edmure: if the Tullys do not surrender, he will catapult Edmure's infant son over the wall and kill every Tully who stands between him and his sister Cersei. Jaime then leaves Edmure to decide.
Edmure later accepts Jaime's offer and walks back to the castle, announcing himself as their rightful lord and convincing the guards to lay down the drawbridge, despite the protests of his uncle Ser Brynden. The guards obey Edmure because they have sworn an oath of fealty to the late Hoster Tully and his son. The guards lower the drawbridge and Edmure enters the castle. Meanwhile, Lothar Frey criticizes Jaime for losing their most valuable hostage. Once inside the castle, Edmure climbs the ramparts and orders the Tully garrison to lower the drawbridge and to surrender to the Lannisters and Freys. Jaime and the combined army then march into Riverrun and occupy the castle, draping the Lannister and Frey banners over the walls. Edmure then orders his men to find his uncle and put him in chains, in order to hand him over to the Freys. However, Ser Brynden has already escaped. At one of the castle's exits, Brynden helps Brienne and Podrick into a boat. Brienne tries to convince Brynden to come along, but he insists on not running away from this fight. He informs Brienne to continue serving Sansa Stark and assures her that she will do a better job of it than he has done. As Brienne and Podrick escape, the Blackfish stays behind for a final stand against several Lannister soldiers. Shortly after, on the ramparts, Jaime is informed of the Blackfish's death. Jaime then sees Brienne and Podrick rowing away on their boat. He quietly waves goodbye, to which Brienne waves back.
Afterwards, Ser Bronn and Jaime then marches to the Twins, the home of House Frey, as they then celebrate their victory in retaking Riverrun. At the celebration, Jaime notices a serving girl who smiles at him curiously. Bronn then complains that all the women desire Jaime, who tries to be modest, insisting that they aren't his type. Bronn then asks if they are "not blonde enough?," alluding to Jaime’s incestuous relationship with Cersei. Jaime then proceeds to loudly call out two serving girls, introducing Bronn to them as a hero of the Battle of Blackwater. At first, Bronn resists, stating that he's not in the mood, but quickly relents and leaves the feast with the two young ladies. Jaime then speaks to Lord Walder Frey, who gloats about their combined victory. When Walder attempts to equate himself with Jaime, calling them both “kingslayers,” Jaime is visibly irritated as Walder could never win a conventional fight. Jaime smugly states that people fear the Lannisters, not the Freys. He then questions the need for the Freys if House Lannister continues to keep helping them hold the Riverlands. When Lord Walder does not respond, Jaime then brusquely leaves the celebration to begin his return to King’s Landing.
Some days after departing the Twins, Ser Bronn and Ser Jaime ride into the capital with the Lannister army to witness smoke pouring from where the Great Sept of Baelor and its surrounding districts once stood. Once Jaime alone arrives to the Red Keep, he joins the crowds of the royal court as they pour into the throne room for Cersei’s surprise coronation. Cersei walks down the path to the throne, flanked by Lannister guards, and ascends the steps. Cersei is then proclaimed as the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms and all the associated titles. The royal court in the throne room glare at her with undisguised hatred, knowing it was on her orders to have the Great Sept blown up with wildfire on the day of her trial to in order eliminate her enemies, including Queen Margaery. This action, however, traumatized King Tommen to the point of suicide directly following the explosion, as he flung himself out of his own window of the Red Keep. Queen Cersei, however, ignores the seething crowd as she has eyes only for Jaime, whose expression back at her is stony. Cersei has achieved her ultimate ambition to become the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms - or at least, what little of it the Lannisters still control. Though Jaime loves his sister, the loss of their last remaining child, as a direct result of Cersei’s treachery, is something he finally cannot turn a blind eye to.
“Now, that is a sorry attempt at a siege. Someone needs to teach those sad twats how to dig trenches… Oh, no. Not me. I’m just an upjumped sellsword… Aye, knight’s don’t get paid… That’s like saying I have a bigger cock than anyone in the Unsullied army.”
— ‘The Broken Man’
“Lesson number one, assume everyone wants to hit you. ‘Cause they do, Pod. Everyone wants to hit a fucking squire. Do it again. Come on, don’t sulk.”
— ‘No One’
“You promised me a lordship and a castle and a highborn beauty for a wife… Don’t say it. Don’t fucking say it.”
— ‘The Broken Man’
“You don’t even have to do anything, do ya? You just sit there, a rich slab of beef, and all the birds come pecking… She doesn’t want me. She wants your golden fingers up her twat.”
“The way all women look at [Jaime] is frankly irritating. I preferred working with the little brother on that account.”
— ‘No One’
“Maybe I’m not in the mood… Fuck it. No need to call me Ser just because I’m an anointed knight.”
season seven
Some time later, the dragon queen Daenerys Targaryen has traveled from Essos to reclaim her ancestral home of Dragonstone, as she plans on invading the Seven Kingdoms and taking the Iron Throne from Queen Cersei. Alongside Daenerys is a strong army of Unsullied and Dothraki soldiers as well as her new Hand of the Queen, Tyrion Lannister. Meanwhile, in forging an alliance with Euron Greyjoy and his Iron Fleet, Cersei has taken out most of Daenerys’ support from Westeros, including Ellaria Sand representing House Martell. She then sends Ser Jaime, Ser Bronn and the Lannister army to seize Highgarden, the castle of House Tyrell. Jaime then confronts Lady Olenna Tyrell in her study, the last surviving Tyrell following Cersei’s explosion in the Great Sept. Olenna asks Jaime how he intends to kill her, speculating he do it with the late King Joffrey's old sword. Remarking on Joffrey's horrible nature, Olenna proudly admits that she enacted measures to protect her family at all costs, with no regrets, but reflects that her actions pale in comparison to the atrocities performed by Cersei. Jaime then produces a small liquid vial and empties its contents into one of the glasses of wine, giving it to Olenna who then drinks it. On the topic of poison, Olenna admits that it was her who was responsible for the murder of Joffrey and asks Jaime to inform Cersei of this fact, whereafter a furious Jaime storms out, leaving Olenna to die.
Afterwards, Jaime coordinates the soldiers loading up the spoils for transport after the Sack of Highgarden allowed them to seize the Tyrell's substantial gold stores, which they send ahead to King's Landing first, before moving on to securing grain shipments. Jaime procures a large bag of gold coins and gives it to Ser Bronn as payment for his services. Bronn, however, is annoyed that this isn't the full reward promised, which included a wife from nobility, as well as a castle. He then half-seriously asks why Jaime doesn't just grant him Highgarden, as they need someone to rule it now. Jaime waves this aside by saying they don't actually intend to hold Highgarden for long, as it would be difficult for Bronn of all people to rule over hostile territory. Jaime also adds that the war isn't over yet. As they later travel along the Goldroad, the Lannister army continues east towards the capital. Bronn asks Dickon Tarly for his honest opinion about war, and is amused at the young lord's lack of frontline combat experience. Bronn and Jaime are then surprised to hear what sounds like distant thunder, until they see an approaching cavalry of Dothraki warriors. Above the approaching Dothraki, the Lannister army sees a massive adult dragon soaring straight for their lines and ridden by Daenerys Targaryen herself. The Lannister army holds their line for a time, but their enemy has the advantage of numbers, and the tide turns slowly against them. For a moment it looks like Jaime might at least be able to force the Dothraki to a standstill - but then Daenerys devastates the Lannister formations with dragon fire. Nonetheless, Jaime desperately takes command of a group of archers, directing them to concentrate their fire on Daenerys. However, Daenerys sees the attack coming and banks her dragon Drogon upwards so the arrow volley harmlessly bounces off his armored scales. Drogon then blasts the archer formations with fire. Jaime avoids the flames and manages to carve a path through the Dothraki horde with his sword. As it cannot be fired with one hand, Jaime then commands Bronn to reach the anti-dragon scorpion that was made upon the return of dragons to Westeros. Bronn reaches the scorpion launches spots and misfires. Daenerys is startled by the scorpion-bolt flying a few feet from her head and spots Bronn on the scorpion as he reloads. Bronn eventually manages to shoot Drogon in the shoulder, but the scorpion is destroyed immediately after by dragonfire. To Jaime's disadvantage, the dragon's armored scales are so tough that the scorpion bolt only managed to cause superficial damage. Nonetheless, the flesh wound grounds the dragon, and he howls in pain. Daenerys then dismounts in attempt to pull the scorpion bolt out. Jaime, however, sees that Daenerys is grounded and immobilized, realizing he still has one chance to end her invasion indefinitely. Jaime grabs a spear and charges his horse across the flaming battlefield to make a death-run for Daenerys as she tends to her dragon. His brother Tyrion, who arrived with the Dothraki warriors and is watching the battle from a safe distance, swears under his breath, calling his brother a "fucking idiot,” worried that Jaime’s going to get himself killed. Just as Jaime is nearly on top of Daenerys, Drogon notices him amidst the chaos of the battle; shielding Daenerys behind his head, the dragon lets out a blast of flame. However, Bronn rushes over to tackle Jaime out of the way, saving him from certain death. They both fall into the river, where Jaime is weighed down by his armor, and sinks beneath the waters, in danger of drowning. In the aftermath of the Battle of the Goldroad, Bronn pulls Jaime from the depths of Blackwater Rush and onto shore. He informs Jaime the only reason he rescued him is that nobody gets to kill him until he gets the reward he's due from the Lannisters. Jaime then remarks on the destructive power one dragon alone unleashed, and realizes they are in great peril if Daenerys deploys all three in future. Bronn assures that he won't be around for such an assault, as Jaime laments his duty to report what happened to Cersei. Bronn thinks it would be safer for him to jump back into the river than deal with Cersei.
Some time later, following the Battle of the Goldroad, Ser Bronn purports to lead Ser Jaime to a sparring session amongst the skulls of the Targaryen dragons underneath the Red Keep of the capital. However, Jaime has been lied to by Bronn as he discovers that it is really a secret meeting with his estranged brother Tyrion, whom he hasn’t seen since his betrayal in murdering their father Tywin. Jaime is initially angry that Bronn has arranged the secret meeting, as Bronn then excuses himself by telling the Lannister brothers that he will leave them to hash things out. Tyrion compliments Jaime on shrewdly and unsentimentally abandoning the Lannister seat of Casterly Rock, insisting that his plan would have made Lord Tywin proud. Jaime barks at Tyrion, urging to not speak about their late father and asserting that he once told Bronn that if he was to see his brother again he would cut him in half. Snapping, an emotional Tyrion points out that their father knew he was innocent with regards to Joffrey’s murder but still condemned him to death nonetheless, having hated him all his life for being born a dwarf. When Jaime demands to know what Tyrion wants, his brother responds that Jaime knows Daenerys Targaryen will win the war. Tyrion adds, however, that Daenerys is willing to make peace under certain conditions and has a more important request than bending the knee.
After Queen Cersei eventually agrees to a summit meeting in King's Landing, requested by the dragon queen Daenerys, Tyrion and the King in the North, Jon Snow, arrive in the capital some time later with their various allies. While Daenerys’ Unsullied army line up in tight formation outside the walls of the capital, on top the walls, Ser Bronn and Jaime discuss how Bronn is unnerved by the idea of soldiers without genitalia, as he's been around enough soldiers to know why they fight. Bronn adds that the Unsullied soldiers fight for no promise of sex and explains that this is alien to him. As they converse, hordes of the Dothraki calvary ride in, a stark contrast to the disciplined Unsullied who don't even blink as hundreds of horses flood past them. but the two ancient enemies are united in cause today. When Tyrion and the Northern party arrive on land, they are escorted by Ser Bronn to the Dragonpit, the location of the summit. During their walk, Bronn reunites with Tyrion’s former squire, Podrick Payne, as well as Brienne of Tarth, both representing the North for the Lady of Winterfell, Sansa Stark. While escorting them the rest of the way, Tyrion refers to Bronn by his title, "Ser Bronn of the Blackwater." In response, Bronn indicates that he's thought about Daenerys since the Battle of the Goldroad. Tyrion then states that if Bronn is reconsidering his allegiance, his offer of doubling whatever others are offering still stands. Bronn assures Tyrion, however, that none need be concerned for him, and that he is looking after himself. Tyrion questions this by mentioning the potential danger in which he put himself in by arranging the meeting between him and Jaime. Bronn then retorts that it's not his head for which Cersei has offered a bag of gold towards. He further explains that bringing Tyrion to her may increase his wealth substantially. After a slight smirk, Tyrion tells Bronn it's good to see him, to which the former sellsword replies with a smile, "Yeah, you too." When they reach the Dragonpit, the summit begins, in which Bronn leads Podrick away, claiming they have no place among the discussion about to take place. When Cersei arrives, she glares hatefully towards Tyrion and quickly grows impatient with Daenerys’ late arrival, only for the dragon queen herself to make a dramatic entrance on Drogon moments later. Tyrion and Jon Snow then attempt to convince the Lannister queen of the greater threat coming from the North. According to Tyrion, one million people populate the crammed capital and they will soon become one million more soldiers in the army of the dead: the real threat coming for the Seven Kingdoms. Cersei callous flippancy of this news angers the normally stoic Jon. Although Daenerys promises to uphold a truce with the Lannisters until the undead army has been dealt with, Cersei dismisses their claim concerning the dead, saying they are simply attempting to strengthen their position while she is standing down. Tyrion replies that they have something to show her, as an undead wight that was captured beyond the Wall if brought out before her. Jon Snow then demonstrates how to efficiently kill a wight when he stabs it with dragonglass. Shaken by what she has witnessed, Cersei at first seems willing to accept a truce, but only if Jon agrees to have the North remain neutral and support neither Cersei nor Daenerys. To everyone’s surprise, and Tyrion's dismay, Jon replies that he cannot do so, as he has already bent the knee for Queen Daenerys. In response, Cersei leaves the summit. Furious, Tyrion rebukes Jon for not being able to make a small lie in order to secure them a political and military advantage. Despite Daenerys’ protests that she will have him murdered - Tyrion declares that he will go and speak with Cersei alone or else they will be right back where they started. Some time later, the three Lannister siblings return to the Dragonpit, where Cersei announces that she will agree to the truce and support their cause by sending the Lannister forces to assist in the coming war alongside the Northmen and the Targaryen army. Afterwards, however, Cersei reveals to Jaime that she does not intend to send their army north, preferring to let Daenerys and Jon’s forces exhaust themselves and then deal with whoever emerges victorious from that conflict. As result, Ser Jaime leaves Cersei behind in the capital and rides north to assist in the war alone.
“Queen of Thorns give you one last prick in the balls before saying goodbye?… There is still the question of my pride. [The money] isn’t a castle.”
“I don’t think you want people to see how you look swinging that thing yet… You won’t be swinging it at me.”
— ‘Eastwatch’
“Men shit themselves when they die. Didn’t they teach you that at fancy lad school? I learned it when I was five. ”
“Men without cocks. You wouldn’t find me fighting in an army if I had no cock. What’s left to fight for?”
“Listen to me, cunt. 'Til I get what I'm owed, a dragon doesn't get to kill you. You don't get to kill you. Only I get to kill you… Dragons are where our partnership ends. I’m not going to be around when those things start spitting fire on King’s Landing.”
— ‘Eastwatch’
“I put yourself at risk - important difference. It's your head Queen Cersei's offered a bag of gold for; it's not mine. Now, thanks to me, she's got two traitors' heads coming right through her door. She can lock them both off as soon as she gets tired of the clever words that pour out their pie holes. All thanks to Ser Bronn of the fucking Blackwater! If that's not looking after myself, I don't know what is.”
season EIGHT
Some weeks following Ser Jaime’s departure from King’s Landing, Ser Bronn is getting ready to have sex with three prostitutes - Marei, Dirah and Craya - but they can't stop gossiping to each other about how many Lannister men the Targaryen dragon burned alive during the Battle of the Goldroad. Annoyed, Bronn points out that he actually managed to wound that very same dragon during the battle using a scorpion-launcher, which Marei quips was "brave" before brusquely shoving him down and mounting him. The prostitutes continue to gossip, but before Bronn can really get started, Qyburn interrupts. Cersei’s new Hand apologizes but states that the queen told him to hurry: she wants to re-hire Bronn for a new assassination. Qyburn points out that Cersei promises to reward Bronn with gold, a castle and a noble-born wife, which were previously taken away from him. Qyburn informs that Cersei wants to correct that mistake. Paying in advance, there is already a wagon laden with gold waiting outside for Bronn. As for the target, Qyburn then presents him with the late King Joffrey's former crossbow - the same one that Tyrion used to kill his father Lord Tywin. Stating poetic justice, Cersei wants Bronn to use it to kill Tyrion, as well as Ser Jaime for abandoning her, in the event that they survive the undead assault on the North against the White Walkers.
Some time after emerging victorious against the army of the dead during the Battle of Winterfell, the Lannister brothers are drinking at a local inn near Winterfell when Ser Jaime informs Tyrion of his new development with Brienne of Tarth. The very drunk Tyrion states his happiness that now he can finally be the one mocking a brother for being with a taller woman. Suddenly, Bronn bursts through the door, pointing a crossbow at them. He informs the pair that Cersei hired him to assassinate both of them. Tyrion, too drunk to care, doesn’t take Bronn seriously, only for Bronn to punch him in the nose so hard he nearly breaks it. Bronn asserts that their sister is not likely to win the war against Daenerys when he saw for himself what her dragons can do, adding that he would prefer to bet on the winning side. Bronn also adds that Cersei offered him the large castle of Riverrun as a reward, and asks Tyrion what "double" Riverrun looks like. Tyrion then casually suggests Highgarden itself. Jaime insists that no "cutthroat" like Bronn would ever be accepted as the Lord of Highgarden. Nonetheless, Tyrion assures Bronn that he will be granted Highgarden. Before departing, Bronn promises that if Tyrion doesn't hold up his end of the bargain he will kill them. After leaving, Jaime asks if they're seriously going to give Highgarden to Bronn, to which Tyrion only says he won't worry about it for now, as that assumes they will all survive the final war against Cersei.
Days later, it is reported to Winterfell that Daenerys and her fleet were ambushed by Euron Greyjoy on Cersei’s command, ultimately resulting in the deaths of one of her dragons and closest advisors. In retaliation, the united Targaryen and Northern forces travel to King’s Landing to lay siege on the capital. Jaime himself arrives shortly before the battle commences and although the Lannister forces eventually surrender, a grief-stricken Daenerys begins to rain fire down on the capital, scorching entire neighborhoods and killing both soldiers and innocent civilians alike. As the falling Red Keep continues to cave in around her, a terrified Cersei dodges falling debris when she suddenly sees Jaime from across the atrium. They quickly embrace before continuing their way deep below the keep. Before the attack, Tyrion had informed Jaime that he had planned for his siblings escape and that there would be a boat waiting for them on the beach. However, Cersei and Jaime find their path has been blocked by fallen rubble as the Red Keep continues to crumble. A frightened Cersei begins to cry, stating that she doesn’t want to die like this. With no hope to escape, Jaime pulls Cersei towards him into an embrace. The twins and lovers embrace for the last time as the ceiling caves, killing them both.
In the aftermath of the Battle of King’s Landing, Tyrion somberly wades through the debris of the fallen Red Keep as he searches for his siblings. When he reaches where the cellar once stood, Tyrion spots Jaime's golden hand underneath a large pile of rubble. Devastated by the sight, Tyrion clears away the rubble stone by stone to find the corpse of his sister Cersei, and is visibly shaken by it. Knowing his brother is next to her under the debris, Tyrion painfully continues to clear away broken rock and begins to cry when he finds Jaime. His dead brother's death-wish has been fulfilled: Jaime "died in the arms of the woman he loved." Afterwards, outside the gates of the city, the Dothraki are celebrating their victory while a large Targaryen banner has been draped over the remains of the gate. Drogon appears with Daenerys and lands behind them. After she dismounts, Daenerys thanks her combined forces, calling them “liberators” for “freeing” the people of King’s Landing. A devastated Tyrion then approaches Daenerys, stating that she “slaughtered a city." With a look of disgust, he throws away his Hand of the Queen brooch down the ash-covered stairs. Outraged by this show of defiance, Daenerys has Tyrion arrested and commands her men to take him away. Following his imprisonment, Tyrion convinces a wary Jon Snow to assassinate Daenerys, as she is now endangering the Seven Kingdoms with her recent turn towards a tyrannical leadership. Following her assassination at the hands of Jon, he is also imprisoned by the Unsullied and awaits trial alongside Tyrion.
After weeks gone by, Tyrion is released from his cell and tried in the Dragonpit before all of the lords of Westeros. Tyrion convinces Grey Worm to let the new ruler of the Seven Kingdoms punish Jon, after the lords in the meeting oppose the Unsullied's desire to execute him. Tyrion then asks the gathering that they should elect the new monarch and end the war once and for all. Tyrion proposes an elective monarchy, "And who has a better story than Bran the Broken? A boy, pushed from the tower, who couldn't walk but learned to fly. The crippled boy who crossed the wall and became the Three-Eyed Raven. He's all our memory. Who better to lead us to the future?" Despite concerns that Bran could never sire any children, Tyrion says it is for the better as heirs often don't make good kings, a nod to Joffrey Baratheon. He proposes that the lords choose Bran as their new king, which is accepted by all except Lady Sansa, who insists that the North will become an independent kingdom again, as it was for thousands of years. Bran agrees to this, accepts his appointment as King and picks Tyrion as his Hand, in order for Tyrion to atone for his past mistakes and for committing treason against Bran's predecessor, Daenerys.
Some weeks later, Lord Tyrion reforms the small council, now consisting of Lord Bronn as the new Master of Coin, who has finally been rewarded for his service to the Lannister brothers with a lordship over the castle of Highgarden. In addition, Bronn has also been made Lord Paramount of the Reach. Joining the pair on the council is Ser Davos Seaworth as Master of Ships, Samwell Tarly as Grand Maester and Brienne of Tarth as the new Lord Commander of the Kingsguard. Samwell gifts Tyrion with a book he partly wrote about the War of the Five Kings named “A Song of Ice and Fire.” Tyrion assumes that this historical reference doesn’t paint him in the best light, as Samwell awkwardly informs that he is not mentioned at all. King Bran then states that some positions are still vacant, which Tyrion assures will be filled before the king departs to search for Drogon. They then discuss the rehabilitation of the city, providing clean water, food to civilians, and the reconstruction of the royal fleet and ports. Bronn expresses dismay at doling out funds for the reconstruction of the royal fleet if it can't be assured they will be utilized properly. He then discusses using some of the gold to rebuild the city's brothels, which is met with opposition. Tyrion then relates how he once brought “a honeycomb and a jackass into a brothel,” as the council continue discussing the reformation of the Seven Kingdoms.
“I am the only man that you ever met that shot a dragon. Nearly killed it… Alright, can we stop talking about the fucking dragons right now?”
— ‘Winterfell’
“I knew your sister was dead the second I saw those dragons. Now, your army may be torn to shit, but I’d still bet on your dragon queen to win. And it just so happens, I’m a betting man. If Cersei’s dead, she can’t pay up. Of course, the odds change if the dragon queen’s Hand turns up dead.”
“That fucking family.”
— ‘Winterfell’
“That’s how all the Great Houses started, isn’t it? With a hard bastard who was good at killing people. Kill a few hundred people, they make you a lord. Kill a few thousand, they make you king. And then all their cocksucking grandsons can ruin the family with their cocksucking ways.”
“You boys are a pair of gold-plated cunts, do you know that? Year after year I’ve shoveled Lannister shit and what do I have to show?”
“The strong live and the weak don’t… Speaking of builders, all the best brothels burned down. The Master of Coin is willing to fund reconstruction.”
— ‘The Iron Throne’